Item: “Master of Disaster” Egg Cup and Toast Cutter
Spotted in: Bhs (British Home Stores), Isle of Wight, England
Tastes like: Plastic. “Egg-celent” eggs and toast not included.
Best used for: Eating eggs… dangerously. And wasting toast.
Unless you’re James Bond (who, may I remind you, never eats anything aside from scotch, martinis, or beautiful women) breakfast is a profoundly un-dangerous ritual. Despite the HazMat-themed packaging and random addition of “Master of Disaster” on the label, this is a contraption that fails at making breakfast dangerous, and succeeds only in making it actually wasteful. And to finish things off, the shapes made by the toast-cutter look more, ahem, rude than like British Bobbies.
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